i think the difference between men getting raped by women and women getting raped by men is not something ridiculous like “men can’t be raped” or “women can’t rape” - they’re both equally harmful and devastating acts - but that we live in a culture that actively encourages men to rape women.
we teach boys and men that women are either prudes or sluts.
we teach them that sex is nothing more than a game and women are objects to be won and boasted about.
we teach them that women secretly enjoy rape.
we teach them that lesbians just need a good bit of cock to set them straight.
we teach them that women don’t really want sex, and that female sexuality is a joke and invalid.
we teach them that if a person is a sex worker, it is absolutely fine to treat them as subhuman.
we teach them that rape is funny and that it’s fine to tell jokes about it.
we teach little boys abstinence or “here is where a penis goes to make a baby”, but nothing about healthy, consensual sexual encounters.
we create mainstream porn that paints women as cock hungry, submissive, surgically altered, man-pleasing objects.
we create mainstream porn that mimics rape.
we ensure that loving, sensual porn is ‘only for chicks’, a seperate category, and not something a red blooded male should watch. it is treated like a fetish whereas rough sex is normalised.
we create music videos in which woman are nothing more than decorations.
we use female body parts to sell beer, clothes, cars, whatever.
we teach men that women are crazy, incoherent and from another planet, and that they can never be understood, and they never say what they mean. we teach them that women are not as important as men.
we teach them that ‘no’ means ‘yes’.
we teach them that ‘not tonight’ means ‘buy me dinner first’.
we teach them that the only way to sleep with a woman is through manipulation - verbal, by physical force, or getting them wasted.
we give them a sense of entitlement. you’re nice to a girl? you listen to her talk? you’re a good friend? then you deserve her time, her body, her love.
and most importantly - we teach them that if the woman is less than “perfect” (an ethnic minority, poor, isn’t cisgendered, is sexually active, is a sex worker, isn’t in a monogamous relationship, dresses like a ‘slut’, has lied about anything at all, is loud and opinionated, won’t fight ‘enough’ during the rape, won’t cry ‘enough’ after the rape, won’t report it straight away, gets a tiny fact wrong…), you will get away with raping them.